It has been a difficult year for all of us. The world has gone through many changes for over the last 18 months with varied or spotty relief. Marriage and surviving the pandemic aftermath is crucial. With the uncertainty and constant changes, the it has placed tremendous stress on couples and marriages. Now as we are returning to a new “normal”, couples must adjust to changing dynamics once again. Those with children have further adjustments to navigate.
Marriages often go through cycles of difficult times, but pandemics are rarely planned and typically not part of this. However, you may be wondering how and if your marriage can survive the aftermath of the pandemic. You are not alone. We have found many couples going through very difficult times during this pandemic and have taken steps to refocus and improve their relationships.
Three tips you can use to help your marriage survive and thrive through the pandemic
-
Be Kind To Each Other
Yes, kindness. Though counter intuitive to many, being kind to your spouse can invite courage, resilience…especially now.
Remember, most everyone has struggled in some capacity due to the pandemic. Whether that was having to shift to working from home, homeschooling kids, or even losing a job — everyone’s year was turned upside down.
When your spouse is annoying you or just can’t understand why they act the way they are, take a step back. Take a moment to pause and remember that they are likely still coping with the added stress the pandemic has brought. While we may have quickly changed our routines and lifestyles, that doesn’t mean we can’t process the last year in healthy ways.
So when it starts to feel rough and emotions are raw, remember to give your partner the grace and encouragement they need. By showing them compassion and kindness, you will be helping to strengthen your marriage. Further, ask for and invite kindness from him/her as well.
-
Appreciate The Small Things You Do For Each Other
Again, this is a practice for us all everyday. Furthermore, the pandemic, hopefully, has made it more clear how much your partner does to keep your family and household running smoothly. Let appreciation come from love for your spouse and for yourself.
In the past year, you have juggled working from home, changes in work, homeschooling kids, being away from family members and friends, and so much more. On top of paying the bills, keeping the house organized, and everything we are responsible for.
You can help your marriage survive past this by remembering and thanking your partner for the little things they do. It might seem insignificant to thank them for unloading the dishwasher, for example, but they’ll appreciate you noticing the small things. If the pandemic taught us one thing this past year, it should be to never take anything for granted. As your family adjusts to changing your lifestyles, always remember that it is the small things in life that really matter the most.
-
Make Time For Each Other
You’re back to working in the office, taking your kids to school or events…you know, the normal grind. While you may have
become easily annoyed with constantly being around your partner at first, you likely got used to it. In some ways, you learned more about your relationship than you expected…some good and some not so good while you have spent time with one another.
What’s important to remember is that even though life is slowly resuming, you should still make time for each other. Juggling everything life throws at you, and your marriage is hard. What is even harder is not feeling like you have a support system in your marriage.
At times you may have felt as if you needed a break from your spouse, which can be healthy. However, now that your lives are going back to being chaotic and busy making sure you still spend some quality time together. Make a commitment that once a day, either settling in for bed or in the mornings, make the time to talk with each other. Catch each other up on your day, your work, or what is bothering you. By opening up to each other and staying interested in each other’s lives, you will prove to one another that your marriage can survive anything.
If you are struggling in your marriage surviving through the aftermath of this pandemic, we can help with marriage counseling.
Go to our Marriage Couples Counseling page for more information or contact us by email at joel@pathwaystucson.com or call us at 520-292-9750
