Does Your Anger Get the Better of You?

Do you feel tension building up inside throughout the day?
Ever try to tell someone a thought or how you feel only to find yourself getting angry?
Does your quick “tongue” get you in a jam?
Ever lost a job or jobs because of your angry outbursts?
Does it seem at times your anger blindsides you and just jumps out like an impulse?

Perhaps you have lost relationships or friendships due to your poor anger management or have alienated others. You may wonder why people don’t listen to you. On the other hand, you may find yourself apologizing to others because of your outbursts. It could be you hold a lot of your hurt, troubles, doubts, emotions inside and then you “explode” in rage. In all of this, you may have experienced unintended consequences to your actions.

If you are stuck in anger, we can help. When you find yourself getting triggered by what others say or do, there are alternative choices. There is hope for better ways of coping with stress. Anger management therapy is here to help you learn and develop new positive habits and choices. Further, these new ways of coping can be applied right after the first session with your counselor.

Anger is Normal

Anger is one of the most common feelings we have as human beings. Each of us have certain things that trigger (or invoke) certain responses or reactions. Anger, though a feeling generally is expressed outwardly (and inwardly…such as in depression). Over the years, we have worked with a great many clients who have struggled with managing their anger. Many times there are other issues we work on along with the anger.

We provide anger management therapy as we believe each person has the ability to address their anger. Moreover, each person is capable of learning new resources, skills, and choices for a much better outcome. By being with a compassionate, non-judgmental counselor, you can learn to sort out, cope and succeed with managing your anger effectively. This is where therapy here with Pathways Counseling Services is vital for you and the ones you love.

Questions you may be considering

Why anger management?

Many times people recognize the negative impact of anger in their lives before they recognize positive solutions. Self-regulating your emotions and having a plan with tools necessary are vitally important in decision making and healthy relationships. Anger management therapy recognizes that anger is one of the most common feelings we as humans experience. First, by acknowledging the anger, it allows exploration into healthy, workable solutions. Secondly, managing anger empowers you to sort out certain triggers to anger and establish new pathways into better choices. Thus, it’s not the anger that gets the better of us, it’s the behavior…whether what we say or do.

Isn’t anger management just for people who are court ordered to go?

It seems to be the case in movies and TV shows however, many people turn to counseling before there is legal involvement. Yes, even when legal involvement occurs, many times there is opportunity to address the outcomes from when the anger occurred. Further, many of our clients see the effects of their anger in their relationships and realize it’s time to take care of it in therapy.

Will it ever go away?

In short, the answer is “yes”…and “no”. The better you improve how to manage your anger, the more you become empowered to direct yourself well. Anger is neither right nor wrong. It is how you manage or control it. In other words, it can be directed in a positive way such as seeking justice for an unjust act. Or it can turn into vengeance and destruction.

Many times when someone gets “stuck in their head”, they restrict options and the opportunity to release tension, hurt, frustration in a positive, healthy way. For example, if you focus on something negative from what someone else said then repeat it over and over again, it may turn into plans of ugliness. However, when learning and practicing new strategies, you keep it in check.

When should I get professional help?

Many times people can pause and redirect themselves long enough to avoid short-term consequences. However, over time the outcome of unchecked anger tends to have negative and many times harmful effects. If you find yourself losing control of what you say or do whether there is stress involved or not, it’s time for therapy help. By addressing your anger in a safe, therapeutic place with a trained professional, you can begin to move toward health and well-being. You decide whether in an individual format via in person or online or in an anger management group. Therapy helps you sort through the emotional pain and muddled thoughts toward hope and relief.

Over the years we have seen positive and at times immediate results right after 1-2 sessions addressing anger specifically. With various tools and techniques we provide for clients, we see our clients willing to participate and move toward reaching their individual therapy goals.

Jack’s story

One fictional composite example is of a client we’ll call “Jack”. Jack came to counseling because his wife threatened divorce. “You get counseling now or it’s over” his wife told him. He recalled that he was a kid with “a chip on my shoulder” and had to be tough in his family. Most of what he knew was to yell to get his point across and to be heard. Anger was the only feeling he knew that was allowed in the family. After getting married, his way of expressing himself stayed the same.

As Jack began counseling, the counselor went over other ways of communicating without yelling, to take a step back, stop and think things through, and other tools were explored. He was able to recognize that he could change the belief that he had of needing to be angry in most situations. Jack learned about what his body and behavior were telling him about how he was feeling. He began and continued to be more responsible for himself and not blame others for how he felt or what he did. As his therapy was ending, Jack said he felt more relaxed, in control of himself and his wife noticed a big positive and peaceful change in him as well.

Our uniqueness

We provide private, confidential counseling which is highly coveted, honored and respected by our clients. There are no primary third parties determining if they will pay or not, what treatment you may or may not receive and how long you will need to get help. Joel Ackley, the clinical supervisor has over 30 years of experience in the mental health field. Further, our counselors have over 50 years combined experience to help assist you through managing your anger and thriving beyond it.

Pathways Counseling Services provides private, compassionate, and supportive anger management counseling which is highly coveted, honored and respected by our clients. Our counselors are educated and experienced with diverse backgrounds, styles, and approaches. You are valued worth being understood by a counselor who truly listens to you while showing unconditional regard and acceptance.